Think back to the past week. Think about the positive, negative, and neutral events that happened. Did you have a bad day? Did you feel abandoned or panicked when the person you turned to wasn’t available? Do you want to feel better when it happens again? Because you will feel let down, disappointed, or abandoned again someday. We can control of our feelings of sadness, abandonment, grief, rage, and anxiety by changing our thoughts with a simple activity called cognitive restructuring.

In 5 steps, you can change what you think to change how you feel.

Name the triggering event I had a bad day last week and Susan didn’t help.
Name the irrational belief Susan didn’t help because she doesn’t like me anymore.
List the feelings caused by the belief Sadness and abandonment.
Dispute the irrational belief Susan didn’t help because she was taking care of her sick baby.
Name the new effect Feel closer to Susan and secure in our friendship.

Now you try it. Start with something small and simple.

Name the triggering event
Name the irrational belief
List the feelings caused by the belief
Dispute the irrational belief
Name the new effect

With practice, you can train yourself to manage your thoughts and keep feelings of depression, anxiety, fear, abandonment, and more from getting in the way. Let me know how it goes. Post a comment or email me at robin@balanceinsight.com