Insight is the ability to recognize the true nature of someone or something, like understanding through your intuition, in your gut.

If you grew up in home with chaos or distress, rages or silence, you probably got really good at watching for cues - like tone of voice, changes in routines, facial expressions, body language, and even relative cleanliness of the house on any given day – to try and make sense of whatever might come next. If you got it right, the reward was a fragile temporary peace.

And when your gut level reality conflicted with the family story, the family’s version of reality, they told you you got it wrong: They weren’t fighting, just talking; You made them spank you; You weren’t mad - you just thought you were; and so on; and so on. All of this confused you and made you question and mistrust your insight.

And now, you probably don’t know who to trust. Or what to rely on. Or what’s real. You might question yourself, “Is this really happening? Am I overreacting? What’s normal?”

Here’s the truth:

~ How you felt then was right and normal for your environment
~ How you reacted and behaved was right for your development and situation
~ Your thoughts and feelings today are completely normal, in the context of all you witnessed
~ And most important: You can learn a new normal, a normal based on today’s relationships, motivations, and intentions

You can learn to adapt to your life today, to see what is and not what someone told you is, to sit without chaos and distress. To recognize and safely react to danger, and to understand and trust in security.

The unexpected can cause fear, anxiety, and a feeling of watching from the outside. But it doesn’t have to immobilize you anymore. You are not helpless anymore.

I can help you gain insight into what was and what is, find your inner strength and confidence, and feel comfortable in today.

Read on for further insights and blog posts. For long lasting resolution, email or call me for counseling to get past your past.