You’ve sort of finished raising your kids. They are adults who still need you, yes, but since they’re on their own, they need you in a different way.
Read MoreStomach in Knots?
If you get a tight stomach even thinking about attending seasonal family reunions, here are some tips to loosen the knots.
Arrive well rested and well fed
It’s harder to manage your emotions when you’re tired and hungry. Even though the gathering might center around food, don’t starve yourself thinking you can eat with everyone else. Eat something hearty and nutritious, like a cheese sandwich, a bean soup, or even veggie sticks dipped in hummus, before you leave your house.
Have a support person
Read MoreSaying NO: 4 Steps to Telling Your Mother No
Like many women of a certain age, we’ve moved past being a rebellious daughter and into being a mother in our own families. We tell our children no when they ask for unreasonable or unhealthy things. We tell our partners no when they have unrealistic expectations. We even tell our best friends no when we need more time with our children and partners. Why, then, is it so difficult to say no to our mothers or fathers or other members in our family of origin?
Read MoreHow to get the most out of counseling - 5 ways
Let’s start by telling the truth: counseling is a large investment of your time and money. Living in the Issaquah area is expensive enough and commuting to work is long enough – no need to throw away time and money. And by the time you start counseling, you’ve probably been suffering long enough that you’re really ready for things to be better. Since your time and money are being spent, here are some ways to make sure to get the most out of it.
Read MoreDon't fight to win!
When your relationship is floundering, fighting is the norm, and winning is rare, try to hold in your mind that your partner is the person you love and you are the person they love. Fighting well is hard to do and you have to practice (yep, practice) fighting to get better at it. You will make mistakes, feel unheard, and say the wrong thing in a heated moment of conflict. Just know that it's like a muscle and needs to be exercised, constructively, building on love and connection. Know that you will get better and so will your partner.
This is part 4 of my four-part VLOG series on conflict in relationships.
Read MoreConflict free in your relationship
We all hear how important it is to argue, disagree, and be authentic. But did you know you can actually do conflict better, communicate better, and improve your relationship if you have areas and times that are free of conflict?
This is part 3 of my four-part VLOG series on relationship conflict and communication. Scroll down to read more, or just watch the video here.
Read More2 Tips for Better Communication
Communication can really mess up relationships since there are so many places it can go wrong, leading to such huge misunderstandings. If you follow just these two tips, you can see an immediate improvement in your relationship and lessen the level of conflict.
Read MoreHow to use conflict to improve your relationship: Cop an attitude & Lead up to it
If you hate fighting you're not alone. Most of us hate fighting and avoid conflict like the plague. But you can learn to communicate and resolve conflict in ways that improve your relationship and mover you closer together.
Read MoreMotherhood and the Luxury of My Broken Sleep
C’mon, admit it. When you were a child of napping age, you knew as well as I did how to muss up your hair, the sheets, and your clothing just so. I hated sleep. I could quietly pull out Nancy Drew, or my Spirograph, something quiet to pass the time until I could try leaving my bedroom again.
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